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[JUDGED] there's a place in the dark where the animals go [oizys vs weaver] - Printable Version

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there's a place in the dark where the animals go [oizys vs weaver] - Oizys - 03-15-2017

Today is a momentous one. Today is the day the gargoyle takes her first steps to warriorhood...and she is terrified.

With her breeding - daughter of two soldiers, an Ironheart and a Basilisk - she would have been forgiven for thinking that it's a foregone conclusion for her to be a whizz on the battlefield. If her lines are anything to go by, she will take to fighting like a duck to water, but life doesn't always work that way. Just because you should be good at something doesn't mean you will be, yet her family name hangs over her head like the reaper's scythe, weighing heavily upon her young shoulders. What if she fails? What if she blunders around, flailing like a dying fish, failing to land a single blow? Oh, she shudders to think of Father's wrath if he thought he'd sired a weakling! Then there's the added knowledge that her dam is probably in the skies watching over her with a reassuring, motherly smile on her lips, with fondness and pride glowing in those electric eyes. That, in a way, is even scarier than the thought of Father's ire, because Nyx died so she could live. Is being a failure any way to repay that?

So when she steps through the last dregs of snow and finds herself the perfect battlefield, she desperately tries to tell herself that she's shivering because of the unseasonable chilly night air, and not because she's shitting bricks at the notion of failing miserably in her first battle. Ker reassures her giant bonded as much as she can, twining her large beak around tendrils of jet black mane and cooing like a mother to her chicks. The raptor is eager to taste equine blood for the first time, to test her talons and beak in battle alongside her gargoyle bonded.

The young mare desperately tries to focus her attention on the task at hand - she's chosen the Basin as her first battlefield because she knows it well, and thinks it will be a safe bet whilst she blunders around trying to learn the ropes. There's a light dusting of snow around and the ground beneath her feet has a layer of black ice that could prove dangerous, but overall it strikes the inexperienced youngster as ideal conditions. Satisfied with her choice, the bulky grey unleashes a loud bellow for an opponent, her cry piercing the night air whilst her heartbeat hammers a steady rhythm in her chest.  


Spar for @Weaver ! Set in the Aurora Basin on a chilly night, minimal snow around. Up to you about magic and companions ;D Feel free to have first attack!

0/3 - words  

image credits

RE: there's a place in the dark where the animals go [oizys vs weaver] - Weaver - 03-16-2017

The perk of living far from home is that she doesn't worry about impressing her mother or father. Not that she has anything to live up to on the battlefield. Neither fought as she does, with hooves and teeth and instinct. They fought with magic, more powerful magic than Weaver will ever have. But both could die, unlike their daughter, and she is far more reckless and wild. Weaver earned her power through blood and pain. In the same way, she will earn her place in Helovia. Not as a warlord, not for violence alone, but her name will mean something.

The call that reaches her is unfamiliar, but it rings through the night like a beacon. Her blood sings with the sound of a battle call. Weaver should be more concerned as she answers, not knowing who issues the challenge. She is small and rather unimpressive compared to the others in the Basin’s army. Not that these facts stop her. These facts make her more willing, more eager to prove her worth on the battlefield.

She walks through the trees, following the call, until another mare comes into view. Barely a mare, but regardless, the girl is tall and thick and those three horns look nasty. Weaver’s not about to take age as a sign of weakness. Hell, she’s hardly older than the girl. They are somewhat matched for speed and agility at least, but the girl is without a doubt far stronger. Weaver’s got endurance on her side, but she’s almost always got that. The ability to take a punch and keep ticking. Fearlessness that even the worst punch won’t stop her (it won’t, after all).

“One should know their opponent's name,” she calls across the distance. The statement buys her time to close the gap, and a moment to confirm that the girl is looking for a fight. Though Weaver’s not actually waiting for an answer. She’s too awake now for sleep, her muscles longing to test themselves.

“Weaver,” she says, offering her own name. Her amber eyes scan the area. It’s clear enough, some snow and ah…of course…ice. That might be worse than the mud Erebos had decided to fight in. And the darkness isn’t helping much, though it’s a clear night, and there’s enough light to see by. Except that ice might go unseen. The eagle with the girl is older, stronger, and scarier than Raven, and Weaver's bonded knows it. He takes to the sky, finding a suitable place to watch without being part of the fight. He could serve as a warning bell for Weaver, his eyesight far better than hers, but nothing more.

She wonders if the girl’s youth has her as eager to prove herself as Weaver is. To make a name. To matter. Maybe they’d be fast friends one day, beating each other to a pulp on the battlefield to make one another better. Weaver could see that working.

As she walks, she attempts to angle herself perpendicular to Oizys’ right side. Without another word, she charges. Wings lift a few inches from her back for a little extra balance on the ice and snow. At the last minute, Weaver ducks her head, all seven horns aimed at the girl’s side. A nice slice on the ribs would give Weaver some advantage against the rather large, powerful girl. Though like always, she’d take any hit, any advantage.

It’s a friendly fight, she knows, but it’s still a fight. She has no plans to impale the girl if she somehow manages a direct hit. But the girl will likely move, so she doubts it's a real concern. No one stands there and take a blow, after all. Well, probably, anyway.

Attack: 1/3 – Words: 623
- Weaver charges at Oizys’ right side with head lowered, attempting to hit Oizys’ ribs

- weaver -



RE: there's a place in the dark where the animals go [oizys vs weaver] - Oizys - 03-20-2017

In the distance, there's a figure. The stone mare's muscles begin to vibrate with excitement, her cold gaze narrowing through the night towards her possible opponent. Ker gives a little gargle of happiness and bounces up and down upon her bonded's back, unable to contain her excitement. Play nice, Oizys warns. This is friendly, remember. Ker deflates, bombarding the soldier's mind with pictures of her plunging her beak into the eyeballs of their mystery foe. No, comes Oizys' firm response. Like a sulky teenager Ker huffs and turns away, filling her bonded's mind with ">:[" faces.

Trying not to be distracted by Ker's antics, Oizys channels her focus onto her approaching opponent. She sees wings, and her heart begins to hammer relentlessly as she contemplates fighting her first battle against somebody who can soar through the air and kick her in the head at any given moment. Those wings are definitely going to be an inconvenience, although the mare attached to them is almost two hands smaller than the grey gargoyle. She's no expert, but judging by the tobiano's build, it's likely that their speed and agility are close enough to not be a factor. That sturdy build reeks of endurance, something Oizys isn't overly blessed in - not just because of her breed, but because she spent most of her childhood afraid to exercise too much for fear The Thing would rear its ugly head and send her into paroxysms of pain. There's a good chance Oizys will tire before this mare does, but the gargoyle does have one thing on her side; her raw, brute strength. It will be in her best interests to try and end this battle quickly, as the longer it drags on, the more chance that she begins to make mistakes borne of exhaustion.

The final thing she notices about her opponent is that the tobiano has an ungodly amount of horns. Oizys has always felt quite blessed in the horn department with the three savage spires that sit atop her head, but this mare has weaponry to spare. She finds herself oggling the impressive arsenal, wondering if this is what stallions feel like when they catch sight of each other's junk. Is she suffering from the female equivalent of dick envy?

Weaver, comes the introduction. Oizys recognises her as another of the Basin's soldiers, and it sends another spasm of anxiety into her gut at the realisation that she's fighting somebody who probably knows her way around the battlefield far more than Oizys does. She's a spar virgin, and this horn-endowed woman looks like she could be a spar slut. "Oizys," she replies, trying to infuse her voice with confidence. She's proud that she manages to keep the waver out of it, giving her a renewed sense of vigour as she prepares herself.

Without warning, Weaver charges. Oizys silently berates herself for not realising that in real battles, people attack without warning. She slides her gaze down to the light snow, disguising the black ice that lurks underneath like a shark in the water, ready to devour the errantly-placed limbs of careless warriors. It shows no signs of tripping Weaver, though, and the mare is forced to react as that shit-tonne of horns come for her right side. Driven by instinct, the massive soldier flings her hindquarters to the left, feeling them skid terrifyingly on the ice. She pivots, sliding like a prize-winning ice dancer, causing the horns to graze across her flesh rather than sinking directly into it. Well, graze is too light a term - at least three of the horns sink into her skin, ripping a set of medium-depth lacerations that immediately begin to throb painfully. Blood dribbles down onto the snow beneath, and the mare realises with a thrill of satisfaction that she's just earned her first battle-scars.

Now, she needs to give some.

Using the momentum of her turn, Oizys seeks to pivot further until she's facing the tobiano's right shoulder. Her own horns joust forwards like a javelin, attempting to sink them into the muscle at the top of Weaver's right foreleg - a good hit to that area might disable the limb. This may be a friendly spar, but Oizys is keen to start as she means to continue in her fighting life - hit hard, and do whatever it takes to earn victory. She thinks of Erebos, sure that he would prefer his soldiers to give it everything they've got, as how else will they learn?

Outraged at the blow to her bonded, Ker barrels towards Weaver with rage glowing in every sinew of her body, although at Oizys' bidding she stays away from the eyes. She seeks instead to sink her talons and beak into Weaver's hindquarters, trying to tear bloody lacerations into the skin and muscle there.


Teaching spar for @Weaver !

1/3 - 799 words

image credits

Grammar/Prose/Emotion: I love how you write Weaver - this post was really clear, well-written and I couldn't spot any typos or grammar errors! Simply maintaining a good standard of writing is the easiest way to rack up points in the judging rubric, so it's great that you're already doing this.

I got a slight feel for Weaver's personality here and could really see why she wants to prove herself, and this is definitely a thread you could carry forwards for the rest of the fight. Getting spar posts to contain enough emotion can be really tricky, so I always find it easier to maintain one solid thread of 'feels' throughout rather than trying to stuff different ones into each fight post. It's clear you understand Weaver which is great, so you should do just fine in this section :D

Attacks : Your attack was clear, concise and you used 'attempt' etc in all the right places, so great job! If I was being super picky I'd say to make sure you specify where exactly on Ozzy's side she's aiming for (shoulder, flank, or just in the middle) but that's only a really small thing, overall it was a really good attack!

Damage taken: N/A. How much do you know about the dice roll system and the roll format etc? :)

Other: You did well mentioning the breed differences between the two! Looking at their base stats is the best way to do this, which it looks like you've done, so that's great :D You also did well mentioning the environment and using Weaver's wings to balance herself against the ice. I deliberately chose quite interesting conditions (as fighting on hard grass with no obstacles can get boring D:) so we'll both need to make sure that we keep mentioning the surroundings and how they'll affect us. The ice could also provide a good reason if one of us rolls a miss, so there's a lot to play with! :D

RE: there's a place in the dark where the animals go [oizys vs weaver] - Weaver - 03-22-2017

It’s a shame Weaver isn't one for talking much during a fight. It messes with her concentration, but more to the point, she gets in a zone. Gets in this place where words don’t exist. A place where you convey intention through biting, kicking, and bleeding. There’s something honest about the fight, whereas words are too easy to manipulate. Not to say she doesn’t use every trick in the book when she’s fighting, but it feels more honest than lying with her tongue.

But still, it’s a shame she doesn’t talk, because she’d have some great conversations. Erebos and her could have waxed philosophical about flying. About being honorable versus being conniving for the better good. Oizys and her could have a nice conversation about female dick envy. Weaver may have seven horns, but six of them are rather short. Only one is long, and none of them are jagged and likely to rip an organ straight out of someone's body. She can imagine one of those savage beasts snagging a lung and slipping it out between her ribs. Weaver’s horns, much to her dismay, make rather clean cuts.

Speaking of clean cuts, she feels her horns rip through flesh. Oops. That might be a bit much for a spar, but that’s what healers are for, right? Mortuus was going to get so sick of seeing Weaver. But she’s too lost in the fight to care now. Her heart thumps like a war drum in her ears, and she forgets the rest of the world. It is only herself and Oizys and a whole lot of horns between the two of them.

Any man would be hella jealous, actually.

Warning pulses in her bond from Raven, who's screaming at her to stop dreaming about horns. It takes Weaver a second to remember the eagle. Shit. This is why she trains. Not only for her love of fighting, though she does love it, but because she is an untempered blade. Because she is definitely not a battle slut, though she plans to be. Because to be worth anything, she needs to learn. Needs to remember the other damn companions, and Ker isn’t one to forget about, vicious looking thing that she is. Weaver has no idea where the bird is, so she assumes somewhere behind her, which means she's fucked. From the front and back. Because Oizys has pivoted and is aiming those three horns for Weaver’s right foreleg.

In an ideal world, she’d run away and tire Oizys out some. Or fly away. But fighting isn’t an ideal world, it’s the real world. In either plan she still has Ker to deal with, and she's not sure if the bird would tire as fast as her bonded. So, she pulls the same move Oizys did. Weaver pivots her hind end to the left, letting herself slip over the ice to move away from Ker’s talons faster. Her wings spread a bit, trying to keep her balance. As soon as she can get her hind legs under her again, she rocks back into a rear, trying to move her forelegs away from Oizys’ horns. She’s too slow to miss them completely. Ker’s talons slice down her rump, leaving a few lovely surface wounds that bloom red, though they don’t feel deep or particularly painful. One of Oizys’ horns skims past the top of her right foreleg, leaving behind something akin to a papercut. It hurts, but it’s more of an annoyance than a hindrance.

Height is not in Weaver's favor here. But she's hoping Oizys’ head is still lowered from trying to get those horns into Weaver’s leg. Weaver's pivot would have left her angled toward Oizys right shoulder if the girl hadn't moved at all. And since she’s already got her front legs in the air and Oizys' neck probably in front her, she figures she might as well go for it. Weaver lashes out with her front legs toward where she hopes Oizys’ neck is. If she’s lucky, she might even hit the other mare’s crest. A good bruise to the neck or crest would make movement more painful, and hopefully hinder some of the other girl’s powerful attacks. Because Weaver’s still sort of waiting for the moment when she gets run over by a mac truck in this battle.  


Attack: 2/3 – Words: 721
- Ker’s talons leave a few small cuts in Weaver’s rump and Oizys’ horn leaves a small cut on the top of Weaver’s right leg
- Weaver rears and attempts to kick Oizys’ in the neck/crest

- weaver -



One question: So, since she rolled a 1 for damage, and the attack hit, would she have to take damage from both Ker and Oizys? Or could she take the damage from just one of the two pieces of the attack? I realize when I roll anything other than a 1 or a 2, splitting the damage is beneficial, but I was just curious about something like this situation.

As for the dice/damage, Heather explained it, so I think I get how they work. It’s really going to be learning what a 2 versus a 3, or a 3 versus a 4, etc. for damage is, I think (and having damage come from the different parts of an attack, or surroundings, etc.). But any and all advice on the dice would be great, because it’s super new to me.

RE: there's a place in the dark where the animals go [oizys vs weaver] - Oizys - 03-24-2017

There's something innately satisfying about trapping Weaver between the twin attacks of the gargoyle and her bonded; the winged tobiano is the meat in an Oizys and Ker sandwich. The damage they cause is nowhere near as much as the mammoth young mare had hoped, yet the mirrored sensations of Ker's claws and Oizys' horn grazing across her opponent's skin sends a shiver akin to an electric shock down her spine. Her first attack, and she hit. It's only the lightest of glances, but it's something.

Even the greatest warlords must start somewhere. Every conqueror, every beast of the battlefield, will have had a first fight at some point. They'll have felt themselves quivering with nerves as Oizys is now, their skin beaded with sweat despite the cold and their muscles thrumming with excitement. They'll have fretted over whether their attacks were right, about whether they'll rise to glory or fall, ashamed, into mediocrity. Even Father will have had a first fight at some point, although the Basilisk as an untried young man is not something the gargoyle can really picture.

He will have won his maiden duel, Oizys is sure of that. The thought causes her glee at landing her attack to fade somewhat; her first blow will count for nothing if she still loses. It could have been beginner's luck, or perhaps a notion of sympathy in Weaver's mind. Let the little girl hit, the tobiano may be thinking. Let her play at being a soldier. The thought angers the grey hybrid, and her eyes flash dangerously. Like a seed, this idea blossoms in her mind, festering in the deepest corners and annihilating any pride to replace it with cold fury. Now it's there, she can't shake it, because under the silver armour of self-confidence is a soft, mushy centre of self-doubt. This innate lack of faith in her own abilities, hidden beneath a mask of bolshy, crude bravado, is what makes Oizys suddenly convinced that she only hit because Weaver allowed it.

That's unacceptable. Angry despite the fact that her assumption is entirely unfounded, the stone mare flattens her ears and redoubles her determination.

Weaver spins, and Oizys begins to turn as well to try and bring herself facing her opponent. Alas, the girl's great size means she cannot pivot quite as fast as her opponent can, not to mention the fact she's reluctant to do so for fear of tiring herself out faster. The tobiano shifts, her hooves lashing for the grey's neck, and Oizys can only flinch to her left in a vain attempt to avoid the blow. Weaver's hooves succeed in clipping the right side of the gargoyle's neck, creating a medium-depth bruise that immediately spreads across the area like wildfire. It's not as severe as it could have been, but it's still painful, and the mare unleashes a hiss of displeasure as her ears disappear even further into the roiling storm of her mane. The bruise doesn't quite impede her movement, but it aches insistently every time she bulks the formidable muscles of her neck. Coupled with the stinging slashes in her side, the gargoyle feels rather the worse for wear, although thankfully neither blow has crippled her beyond repair.

Now is the time for intelligence, she thinks. Weaver will probably expect her to try and attack with her horns again, to lunge forwards and stab or to take advantage of the tobiano's positioning and try to push her over....so Oizys, contrary as ever, does the exact opposite. She launches herself backwards, legs spread wide to aid her balance on the slippery ice, and then calls upon her magic. She hadn't planned on using it, wanting to fight for the first time with her body's strength alone, but she's so determined to win now and live up to her father's great name that she will do anything in her power to claim victory. The air next to her sizzles and suddenly there's three small eagles made of blue-black electricity, sparking ominously against the night sky. They fling themselves forwards in unison; one tries to slam squarely into Weaver's face to try and cause a painful shock, whilst the others seek to collide with the mare's left and right shoulder apiece. Vindictive pleasure sparks through Oizys at the sight of her creations; let's see Weaver allowing those to hit!

With another loud screech, Ker plummets down once again. She aims for the cuts she'd made in Weaver's flank from her previous attack and attempts to grind her talons and beak into these wounds again to try and deepen them, careful to avoid the spark-eagles as she does so.


Teaching spar for @Weaver !

2/3 - 775 words

image credits

That's a good question! You don't have to take damage from both attacks, it's entirely up to you. You could have:

- Taken both attacks and split the damage
- Taken Ozzy's attack and avoided Ker's
- Taken Ker's attack and avoided Ozzy's
- Avoided both and had Weaver injure herself by tripping etc

So the choice is yours :D For a low roll like this one, I would probably be inclined to just take the damage from one attack then avoid the second one. As you say, for higher rolls it's beneficial to split the damage so you avoid taking heavy damage to one area - the only exception to this is a critical hit, where it's preferred for you to take the damage from one source. That's the great thing about this dice roll system - whilst the dice roll determines the level of damage, it's entirely up to you how you decide to take it.

Let me know any other questions you have, I'm happy to answer :D

Grammar/Prose/Emotion: 'Gets in this place where words don’t exist. A place where you convey intention through biting, kicking, and bleeding. There’s something honest about the fight, whereas words are too easy to manipulate'. I loved this sentence, among many others! Weaver's emotions were clear and I really enjoyed reading her mental musings. Horn envy is definitely a thing ;D

Your post was clear and mostly typo-free (I only spotted one - 'Oizys' neck probably in front her'), which is awesome.

Attacks : Your attack was nice and easy to read, and it was clear where Weaver was aiming for. It was descriptive enough that I could picture her movements, so great job! My only small gripe is that I wasn't sure whether Weaver was actually rearing up or whether she was just kicking out her forelegs - be sure to really specify things like this so your opponent can respond correctly :D

Damage taken: I think you took enough damage for the 1 roll, although as I said above, I personally would have just taken one of the attacks - taking both was fine however, and it was clear that the damage is minimal which is about right for a 1 roll. Here's the chart I use when deciding how much damage to take based on the roll:

1: Very minor bruise/cut that won't impact movement
2: Reasonably minor bruise/cut that won't impact movement
3: Quite painful bruise/cut that won't impact movement/maybe a pulled muscle
4: Moderate bruise that restricts some movement/reasonably deep cut/badly pulled muscle/sprain
5: Severe bruise that restricts movement/muscle-deep cut/maybe a very minor bone fracture/serious sprain
6: Very severe bruise that will restrict movement/severe muscle-deep cut/broken or fractured bone

I then alter this based on my opponent's damage stat, because remember, when you take damage it's not just the dice roll you need to look at, it's your opponent's damage stat as well. For example, in this fight Ozzy's damage is 6.5 whereas Weaver's is 3. This means that an Ozzy attack will hurt more than a Weaver attack of the same roll, sort of like the difference between being punched by a normal person compared to being punched by a professional boxer. So if Weaver rolled a 6, I might err towards very heavy bruising/deep cut rather than broken bones, because of her low damage stat. In contrast, if a character with a damage stat of 8 for example rolled a 6, you'd need to take really heavy damage, like broken bones or multiple fractures.

Also bear in mind that higher rolls should affect you throughout the fight. If you fractured a back leg and then reared up to attack, it would result in a deduction, so be careful to remember your injuries and have them affect you. In this fight, because of Weaver's low damage stat none of Ozzy's wounds are really restricting her movement, however I'm making sure to keep mentioning them so it's clear I'm not ignoring them.

Other: You're doing a great job of mentioning the surroundings. I really like how Weaver is using her wings to balance herself on the ice, and I also like how you're referring to their breed/size differences regularly. This is a really good sign, so keep up the good work :D

RE: there's a place in the dark where the animals go [oizys vs weaver] - Weaver - 03-28-2017

Actually, it’s good Weaver doesn’t talk during fights. Because if she had any clue what was going on in Oizys’ head, she’d be rolling on the ground laughing. And then Oizys and her massive bulk could stomp on Weaver, ending this fight pretty damn quick. But the thought that Weaver is good enough on the battlefield to choose if an attack hits her is really that laughable. Weaver has sparred one other time. She has fought a lot, but there’s a difference. She scrapes her way through fights and gets the hell out, because sometimes that’s the only recourse she has. Weaver doesn’t win. She survives.

Which isn't even completely accurate. She died once. That’s a hell of a loss. But she's lucky. Lucky enough that Death decided to pity her, that he decided to send her back to the living. Lucky enough that Ker’s talons don’t cut her flesh to bloody ribbons. Lucky enough that Oizys' horn doesn’t take her leg off. She’s hardly letting Oizys hit her. It’s only luck that saves her.

Because luck’s all she has. Weaver isn’t large or powerful or fearsome. She’s tiny, made up of only fearlessness and gumption. It’s not enough. She is not enough. She has no place on a battlefield. So she fights harder, throws herself headlong at opponents she should never face. Oizys may be a spar virgin, but Weaver is only newly deflowered. At least the younger girl looks like she was born for this.

Her feet hit flesh and she’s thrilled, but now there’s doubt in the back of her mind. A creeping realization that she is weak, that she isn’t enough. That she will never be as good as Oizys or Erebos or anyone else for the sheer fact of her size and strength. The blow to Oizys’ neck, though a decent one, does little to hinder her. The cuts in her side don’t seem to matter much either. None of it is enough. She is not enough.

They both have so much to prove, even if only to themselves. Not that they know how similar they are.

Weaver’s feet hit the ground and Oizys is already backing up. Clever, but I don’t think so. It behooves Weaver to let Oizys tire herself out, but she ignores this fact. She’s too determined to land a half decent punch that does something. Instead of staying away, Weaver moves forward, trying to chase her opponent. Her wings spread in a powerful flap, lifting her into the air and off the ice. That’s when the electric eagles appear and warning pulses through her bond with Raven again. Hell. Bloody freaking hell.

At this point, she only has one choice: fly. So, she does. It’s enough to escape Ker’s talons (she’s got enough cuts back there already, thanks). The two electric eagles aiming for her shoulders miss, swooping beneath her belly instead. But the one coming for her face is another story, because she’s flying right at the thing. She goes up and to her left as fast as she can, so when the electric eagle hits her, it grazes her right shoulder. The shock is immediate, freezing her in mid-flight so she's gliding toward the earth.

But then it passes (thank the Gods) and she flaps her wings again, getting away from the ground. Her shoulder twinges, but it doesn’t feel like any damage was done. It's like touching an electric fence, shocking but hardly life threatening. Everything tingles in a weird but good way, and she feels alive.

She circles around, trying to get behind Oizys and approach at a slight angle to the girl’s right hind end. She’s high enough to dive, aiming for the middle of the girl’s back, to the right of her spine. In a real fight, she’d go for the spine, but that is too much here. Even for Weaver. Even when she needs to make a worthwhile mark on this girl.

She opens her wings at the last minute, hoping to avoid a complete collision, kicking her front feet toward her target. She tries to fly over Oizys, though who knows where the girl is at this point, and kicks her back legs out for good measure. If the girl hadn’t moved at all, Weaver would be aiming for more or less the same spot on the left side of Oizys’ back. But with Oizys likely moving around, Weaver’s just adding that second kick for good measure.

Attack: 3/3 – Words: 745
- One of the electric eagles grazes her shoulder and she is momentarily shocked
- Weaver tries to fly diagonally over Oizys, kicking her front feet toward the ride side middle of her back, and then kicking her back feet toward the left side middle of her back.

- weaver -



RE: there's a place in the dark where the animals go [oizys vs weaver] - Oizys - 04-03-2017

The adrenaline flowing through her body helps numb the pain of her wounds slightly, but not enough. They're still pulsing like heartbeats against her skin, especially the cuts caused by her opponent's horns. The congealed blood has stained her grey pelt an ugly brown colour, rather than the splendid shade of vivid red that she'd hoped. Whilst it may seem churlish to be annoyed about the colour of one's wounds, it's just another reminder that battle is nowhere near as glamorous as Oizys had expected it to be. She'd expected her cuts to bleed beautiful crimson, and to not hurt that much. She'd expected all her blows to land heavily, causing her opponent untold pain. She'd expected it to feel glorious, exciting - easy.

Right now, it feels like none of those things. Her blood dries like a shit-stain, she's tired and grumpy and achy and not feeling in the least bit glamorous, and her excitement has faded away to be replaced by irritation because she can't seem to land a solid hit upon this slippery tobiano bitch. As for it being easy...fuck that. It's the hardest thing she's ever done.

Only one of her spark-eagles manages to find its mark, and Ker also comes up empty handed. Now the winged woman is up in the air, and the gargoyle's ears pin against her sweaty scalp as she frets about what the hell she's meant to do now. She could get Ker to dribble some blood into her mouth so she can transform into her, yet for unfathomable reasons, when she shifts into a bird she flies like a brick on drugs. No, if Weaver decides to stay up there, there's fuck all Oizys can do about it.

Hopefully the tobiano's honour will dictate for her to come back down and fight properly, but the stone soldier isn't banking on it.

Aware that Weaver's probably going to approach from behind, Oizys attempts to turn, but again she's too slow. Her only warning of the impending attack is Ker's mental screech of "DUCK!", and whilst she's not in the habit of listening to her feathered companion (indeed, she'd normally do the exact opposite out of spite), she doesn't think that Ker would lie to her. So she splays her legs and lowers herself, tucking her head downwards in case Weaver is going to try and kick her in the skull; she can't descend quite fast enough, though, and the tobiano's front hooves clatter into the right side of her rump due to her attempt at turning. Another bruise immediately bursts into life, equally as painful as the one on her neck, although the glancing nature of the blow prevents the bruise from being as deep as it could have been. "My ass!" bellows the gargoyle, despite her vow to not unleash any profanities during this fight. She just can't help it - it fucking hurts and nobody is getting fruity on her booty without her express permission.

Suddenly blinded by frustration, pain and a desire to enact revenge, Oizys folds her hind end beneath her, lowering as far as she can until her back legs are coiled like a spring. This movement causes Weaver's second kick to just miss its mark, and the stone soldier chooses that moment to strike; she explodes upwards into a tall rear, using every inch of contained energy in her bulky hindquarters and trying her best to ignore the spasm of agony from her newly-acquired bruise. Twisting as she rises, she seeks to crash her horns into Weaver's right hind leg in the immediate aftermath of the other mare's second kick, hoping to gore her twisted weapons deep into the limb to try and cause more than a scratch upon her foe's sacred hide. She's exhausted, sweating, hurting everywhere, but she's determined to land this last hit. Her final remaining ounce of honour tells her not to try and cripple her opponent, but she wants it to hurt all the same.

Ker descends once again, aiming her beak and claws for the cuts on Weaver's back end for a third time in an attempt to deepen their severity. She is frustrated like her bonded, and feels Oizys' pain as clearly as if it were her own. She, more than anybody, knows of the ambition that burns in the gargoyle's soul, knows how much winning this fight would mean to the giant young mare. It would be vindication of everything they've both worked towards, proof that their strong blood has translated to strong bodies.

The raptor is determined to do whatever she can to help her mind-partner, no matter the cost.


Teaching spar for @Weaver !

3/3 - 772 words

image credits

Grammar/Prose/Emotion: I think this was your strongest post emotion-wise - I absolutely loved it. 'Weaver doesn’t win. She survives.' and 'Weaver isn’t large or powerful or fearsome. She’s tiny, made up of only fearlessness and gumption. It’s not enough. She is not enough. She has no place on a battlefield. So she fights harder, throws herself headlong at opponents she should never face.' gave me all of the feels. You wrote her really well in this fight, with a consistent thread of emotion throughout, so great job!

The post also flowed nicely, easy to follow and using a beautiful variety of language. In fights it's sometimes hard to find the happy medium between being overly poetic at the expense of good attacks/defences, or sacrificing writing for the sake of robotic perfection with the more technical side. You did well in managing to express emotion and keep up a high standard of writing whilst also having clear, well-thought attacks. You should score highly in this section in the rubric :D

Attacks : It took me a couple of readthroughs to understand Weaver's attack, but I think that was down to me being stupid rather than anything bad on your part xD You did well by throwing in the line about not being sure where Ozzy would be, as it could have been bordering on PP for Weaver to have flown up, circled and attacked without Ozzy being able to move at all.

You described the kicks in good detail, as it was quite a fiddly attack to explain. I like kicking attacks, as they're super effective and realistic given how much RL horses use their hooves, so it was a good idea and as I said, you described it well. I have no issues here c:

Damage taken: Ah, the curse of the 1s xDD You did well reacting to the attacks and I think you took the right amount of damage for the roll. A gentle shock from one of the spark-eagles was probably the best way to take the roll, and you did well describing how Weaver avoided the other attacks too!

Overall, you've done well taking damage in this fight. It's helped that both Ozzy's rolls have been 1s, as they're probably the easiest rolls to take damage from as you don't need to worry about accidentally crippling your character for the rest of the fight by taking too much damage. You seem to understand how the dice rolls correlate to taking damage, which is great! :D Participating in more fights with different dice rolls (instead of ALL THE 1S xD) will help you get even better at taking different levels of damage, and knowing how much to take from each attack.

Other: Considering you're new to fighting here, you did really well! You mentioned the differences between their breeds and the surroundings, and I didn't see any major problems with either your attacking or defending. In fact, these are probably some of the easiest notes I've ever written lmao! Thanks for a really fun fight :D

RE: there's a place in the dark where the animals go [oizys vs weaver] - Weaver - 04-09-2017

There is nothing beautiful about battle. She’s known that since she was a child, since she struggled to survive the literal apocalypse. Now is not the time to think of those four horses, but the memory comes to her anyway, as it often does when she fights. Weaver cannot help but remember Famine's paralyzing hunger, Conquest's crippling disease, or War’s hooves snapping her ribs. In the end, what she remembers is how helpless those four horses made her feel. The only thing she could do when Death came was to let him take her. She gave herself to him, hoping her death would be enough to stop him.

Battle is not beautiful, but what it creates is stunning.

Death is a beautiful thing, even if it the living don’t know it. Those Death leaves behind are beautiful too, crafted with strength and confidence. Spars are a means to an end. They are a means to power, to confidence, to a beauty unimaginable when your skin screams in agony, when shit-brown blood stains your coat. It’s a fact she knows well, and it’s the end result that keeps her going. That makes the fight and the pain and exhaustion worth it.

She is not enough, but she will be. She will spar till red forever stains her white patches, till she’s lost count of the broken bones. She will loose again and again and again until one day, she might actually win. Until she is enough.

Her hooves smack into Oizys’ ass, and the resulting roar is hilarious. Even if the blow isn’t overly painful to the gargoyle, Weaver delights in it. “My ass”  rings through the air around her. “But it’s a beautiful ass,” she yells, turning her amber eyes toward the mare as she flies over, her second kick missing. This is what happens when you get distracted, but she almost doesn’t care, mind reveling in this moment. “I couldn’t resist!”

Thank the Gods she’s looking. Thank the freaking Gods she’d turned to cast a winning, flirty smile at Oizys. Weaver is watching as the girl tries to coil her hind end beneath her, giving Weaver enough time to react and not lose a leg. Shit. She should have flown away when she had the chance, rather than teasing. Too late for that. Weaver tips to her left, sweeping her wings in a powerful flap, trying to move up and to the left. Away from those organ skewers on the girl’s head.

But she’s too close to Oizys (who’s got plenty of height to help her here) and too slow to get away completely. Weaver manages to get her leg out of the way, but the horns rip through the skin along her right butt cheek. She can feel the skin part, blood oozing from the wounds and she hisses through clenched teeth. Raven has sparked another warning in their bond, and she's tempted to kick at that fucking eagle. But that would be stupid, because if anyone hurt Raven, Weaver would turn into a momma bear. And what she didn’t want was Oizys to turn into a momma bear. Also, Weaver isn’t that cruel.

Instead she concentrates on flying, moving forward to avoid Ker's talons. The lacerations in her ass are more than enough, and she doesn’t need deeper ones. Ker’s attack misses, the wind of his momentum her only sign the raptor was there. After she’s a reasonable distance from her opponent, Weaver lands. She lands with most of her weight on her front, testing her back right leg with light pressure. Useable, but damn does it hurt.   “You did a hell of a number on my ass as well. So we’ve even,” she says with a smirk and, somewhere in those words, respect. The girl would be a formidable one of the battlefield, and Weaver is glad that in a real fight they are on the same side.

Words: 658
- Weaver gets three nice slices on her right butt cheek and is generally sassy about asses

- weaver -


Thank you! For the notes and the super fun fight.

RE: there's a place in the dark where the animals go [oizys vs weaver] - Official - 05-14-2017

By my verdict: OIZYS is the winner!

Realism [+2]
You write your attacks, defenses, and injuries well. Only in your second post did I feel you took too much damage, and in your third post I didn’t find it realistic she could just take off from a stand still, much less on slippery ice - I prefer to see running starts for a pegasus to get airborne, or diving off somewhere high. I liked your utilization of your companion as a warning system!

Generally you had a good mind for timing, but in your second post you wrote pivoting your hind by sliding across the ice to dodge the eagle, then putting weight on your hind in order to rear up and dodge Oizy’s horns. This reads very much as a 1, then 2 processes, while the eagle and Oizys’ attacks were simultaneous so escaping in your way would have only saved you from one of them.

You also did a good job mentioning breed/stat differences at times, especially in your first post. You included surroundings sometimes and used it in your second post, but I would have liked to see a lot more of that incorporated especially given them fighting on ice wouldn’t just be helpful for sliding to dodge, but would also probably mess up some attacks or escapes.

Emotion [+2]
You did a great job balancing the action and emotion throughout the fight, and I really enjoyed the humor during it all as well! You had a tendency to start off with emotion though and then do action, so try to intersperse it more.

“That might be a bit much for a spar, but that’s what healers are for, right? Mortuus was going to get so sick of seeing Weaver.”

Prose [+1.5]
You had some great writing and especially humorous lines, but I was looking for more imagery and vocabulary to expand on your descriptions. Flow was also impeded often, but I decided to score that under Readability since it impacted that more heavily.

“Oizys may be a spar virgin, but Weaver is only newly deflowered. At least the younger girl looks like she was born for this.”

Readability [+1]
For the most part you had almost no typos and most grammar was correct! However you have a habit of starting sentences in ways that seem like a continuation of your prior sentence - words like “but”, “and”, “because”, etc. are not the correct way to start sentences. It’s easy to dismiss a few times, but each post was riddled with these and it really made things choppy and detracted from your great writing.

There were also a lot of sentences that read as incomplete or fragments because they were really a continuation of the sentence before, but you’d select periods over commas, semicolons, or dashes to continue the thought. Sometimes it was appropriate to end with a period, but then the way you would start your next sentence wasn’t correct, so just review your wording and the way things flow and transition. Reading aloud can help this, because it should roll off easily like a conversation, where as a lot of period or continuations after an end will cause pauses when you talk aloud which should help you notice when that’s off.

“To make a name.” (incomplete sentence)
“To matter.” (incomplete sentence)
“...and take a blow…” (takes)
“Well, probably, anyway.” (incomplete sentence)

“...which means she's fucked. From the front and back. Because Oizys has…” (this sentences are jarring. Commas or semicolons would have worked much better here)
“...she’d run away and tire Oizys out some. Or fly away.” (Comma or semicolon instead)
“...akin to a papercut” (paper cut)
“...toward Oizys right shoulder…” (Oizys’)
“...in front her…” (+of)
“...girl’s powerful attacks. Because Weaver’s still…” (Starting this with because makes this sentence seem incomplete.)

“Weaver doesn’t win. She survives.” (comma, semicolon, or dash instead of period)

Finally tally: 36.5+(6.5*2)= 49.5 HP


Realism [+3]
I was really impressed with how balanced your realism was all throughout the fight. You consistently had great responses and explanations for attacks and defenses, and you incorporated breed/stat differences and the surroundings often and effectively. Your third post did fall flat in some of this regard which ultimately did drag your score down, but your first and second posts were excellent.

I liked the way you used the ice to your advantage in your first post to slide and therefore evade some of the attack, but I would have liked to see the ice also cause problems for you later, because it would be both useful and a hindrance. Your second and third post damages didn’t seem like enough given your injury explanation. For a 3 and up I’d really like something more than a bruise, which if it doesn’t make sense for you to be bleeding, then that bruise better affect you in some way. It is still a 3 so it doesn’t need to be severe, but your descriptions came off more as 2 damages. For instanced in both posts with the heavy bruising, you still moved Oizys’ body as if there was no issue when there should have been a stiffness or reluctance you use that body part which might make your movement/attack less strong/balanced and perhaps cause more issue with the ice.

Also in your third post I didn’t fully understand how Oizy’s sitting further down on her rump would have made her completely miss Weaver’s second kick attack. As it was Weaver didn’t state where she was aiming (and that, if tyouched upon by you could have been enough explanation for why it missed), but if she aimed for your rump and that lowered, I’d still expect it to hit some of your neck/upper body given that that lifted higher in order to lower your rump so much. Doing so also would have helped you take more appropriate damage for a 3.

You did a great job with the surroundings and breed!

Emotion [+3]
I really enjoyed the emotion in this fight and the humor. I constantly felt like I was attached to Oizys and understood everything she was feeling and why she was so motivated. You did well at balancing this with action and carrying the emotion throughout your posts so it was partnered with the action.

“She finds herself oggling the impressive arsenal, wondering if this is what stallions feel like when they catch sight of each other's junk. Is she suffering from the female equivalent of dick envy? “

“She's a spar virgin, and this horn-endowed woman looks like she could be a spar slut.”

“This innate lack of faith in her own abilities, hidden beneath a mask of bolshy, crude bravado, is what makes Oizys suddenly convinced that she only hit because Weaver allowed it.
That's unacceptable.”

“Whilst it may seem churlish to be annoyed about the colour of one's wounds, it's just another reminder that battle is nowhere near as glamorous as Oizys had expected it to be.”

Prose [+3]
Great writing all throughout with an expanded vocabulary, smooth flow, and good imagery.

“...the winged tobiano is the meat in an Oizys and Ker sandwich."

Readability [+2.5]
For the most part no spelling or grammar mistakes. I did find your table a bit hard to read due to the color of the font on the black background and it also seems like small and skinny font.

“...herself oggling the…” (ogling)

“He will have won his…” (would have)
“The thought causes her glee at landing her attack to fade somewhat…” (reads awkwardly, I had to re-read a few times to understand)

Finally tally: 54.5+(11.5*2)= 77.5 HP